Top 10 ways to solve Shoreview’s turkey troubles
Posted on 03. Mar, 2010 by Chris Dohman in People
Now for the lighter side of the turkey debate in Shoreview. Please feel free to share your solutions and expand the list in the comments.
Top 10 ways to solve Shoreview’s turkey troubles.
10 – Set the neighborhood kids loose with their favorite nerf guns.
9 – The Boy Scouts are always prepared, recruit the local Boy Scout troop archery club to take care of things.
8 – See if Shoreview’s resident falconer is up to the task of hunting wild turkeys.
7 – Shoreview restaurants are now mandated to serve thanksgiving turkey dinners year-round.
6 – Have the Metro Gang Strike Force seize the turkeys… you’ll never have to see or account for them again.
5 – Have Shoreview Public Works Director Mark Maloney pour pervious concrete over turkey loitering grounds.
4 – Gear up Wild fan & Shoreview Mayor Sandy Martin to mind the nets, no fowl will get by her.
3 – Tell Shoreview Councilmember Blake Huffman that the turkeys are in favor of the $5.6 million maintenance center project and he’ll run ‘em out right out of town.
2 – Send a letter to Arden Hills asking if they would like to annex Shoreview turkeys.
1 – ….and the number one way to solve the Shoreview turkey troubles…… The Annual Shoreview Turkey Drop promotion ala WKRP
* no turkeys were harmed in the creation of this post.
